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Sep. 12th, 2013 11:58 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
promenyWell, looks like my brilliant plan isn't going to work. Apparently librarian jobs are really fucking hard to get. I was right in thinking that it would be a relatively easy degree, though, although that is pretty much irrelevant.
So I don't know what to do. I want to work, but I was talking about it with one of my friends this morning and she said that I really probably couldn't have a full-time job. She is my former boss so she would know about that.
Oh well. It is kind of fun to have all this time to yourself anyway and not worry about money so much. At least I have constructive hobbies.
But still, I need to have a plan for my life. I don't want to be some loser who does nothing with his life. An Omega male, and stuff. I want to accomplish something, and grow up. I am on my way for that, but right now I'm sort of in the no-man's land. It has been interesting being in that metaphysical place, but eventually you want out, you know?
I had Mexican food with my father three days ago, and during the ride he went on about how I should eventually work and I shouldn't be getting money for free. Wasn't it his fucking idea that I should be on SSI? He can't have it both ways. Of course I should and shouldn't, but there really is no way for me. I would if I could.
But nonetheless, I'm more or less happy how things are right now. I don't beat myself up over it, because I fucking respect myself and realize that it isn't my fault, and there is little I can do about it.
Still, though. I don't want to stagnate, and end up being nothing.
So I don't know what to do. I want to work, but I was talking about it with one of my friends this morning and she said that I really probably couldn't have a full-time job. She is my former boss so she would know about that.
Oh well. It is kind of fun to have all this time to yourself anyway and not worry about money so much. At least I have constructive hobbies.
But still, I need to have a plan for my life. I don't want to be some loser who does nothing with his life. An Omega male, and stuff. I want to accomplish something, and grow up. I am on my way for that, but right now I'm sort of in the no-man's land. It has been interesting being in that metaphysical place, but eventually you want out, you know?
I had Mexican food with my father three days ago, and during the ride he went on about how I should eventually work and I shouldn't be getting money for free. Wasn't it his fucking idea that I should be on SSI? He can't have it both ways. Of course I should and shouldn't, but there really is no way for me. I would if I could.
But nonetheless, I'm more or less happy how things are right now. I don't beat myself up over it, because I fucking respect myself and realize that it isn't my fault, and there is little I can do about it.
Still, though. I don't want to stagnate, and end up being nothing.
